Reality is an illusion that occurs due to the lack of alcohol.

Beauty lies in the hands of the beerholder.

Work is the curse of the drinking classes. Oscar Wilde

When I read about the evils of drinking, I gave up reading. Henny Youngman

24 hours in a day, 24 beers in a case. Coincidence?

Life is too short to drink cheap beer.

One more drink and I'd be under the host. Dorothy Parker

Without question, the greatest invention in the history of mankind is beer.Oh,I grant you that the wheel was also a fine invention, but the wheel does notgo nearly as well with pizza. Dave Barry's Bad Habits, Dave Barry

Not all chemicals are bad. Without chemicals such as hydrogen and oxygen, for example, there would be no way to make water, a vital ingredient in beer. Dave Barry

The problem with the world is that everyone is a few drinks behind. Humphrey Bogart

Friends don't let friends drink Light Beer.

Why is American beer served cold? So you can tell it from urine. David Moulton

A drink a day keeps the shrink (psychiatrist) away. Edward Abbey

People who drink light "beer" don't like the taste of beer; they just like to pee a lot. Capital Brewery, Middleton, WI